Tag Archives: surviving

I know, I know, not supposed to be typing . . . bad patient!

30 Aug

But, I just had to let you all know that I am feeling a lot better tonight (probably because I wasn’t typing ūüôā or over doing it in general). I rested a lot and a dear friend looked after me all day. Finally, my parents get a break, they have been here every day, my Mom has stayed with me every night. So, now she gets a break and so does my Dad. I am so grateful for their love, support and for being so smart! I am so lucky to have them as parents.

I had the energy to go out to dinner with some friends for a girl friends birthday. I put on a dress, make up, the whole deal. It was great to be out for a little bit.

Now I am going to bed and plan to spend most of tomorrow in bed as well (it proved to be the best route for today).

Please keep me in your prayers.

Love to you all,


Holy Crap!

20 Aug

Pain, pain go away. Don’t come back another day.

Poor Molly . . .

23 Jul

This is my loyal “pup” Molly, she’s 15 years old. Molly SmilingPoor Molly, she is getting kind of tired of me going through Chemo. She’s not too happy. Resists going for walks unless I am going with her. When someone comes to walk her, she tries to stay here with me, then reluctantly goes ahead, stopping and looking back for me. So sweet, but it makes me feel bad.

I am very tired and weak after this last chemo round. But, I am definitely on the mend. Oh, not that it really matters that much, but my hair started growing back after the fourth chemo, so maybe I am getting a head start on a head of hair. ūüôā

Thank you to everyone for your continued prayers and support!

Looking forward

3 Jul

So the weekend is nearly here and I am coming out of this past chemo round now, thankfully.  I am feeling a lot better than last night.  There is improvement really with every hour now.  I am so grateful for that. I am not 100% yet, but I am working on getting there.

Fortunately, tomorrow will mostly be rest and time with friends.  And, maybe even a trip to the gym.  I am finding that going to the gym is far easier than walking because with the gym I can always quit when I need to and go home if I start to feel weak. But, once I have walked half a mile, I have to walk it back.  With the heat, this is a bigger issue now as I really can not tolerate much warmth.  So, the air conditioned gym is a great way to go right now.

Well, just wanted to check in and let everyone know I am definitely on the mend from this last round.

I will write more soon.

Two thirds of the way done with chemo!!!

7 Jun

Well this time I am NOT writing at 4:30 am because I haven’t been able to sleep. ¬†Instead, it is because I just woke up after sleeping for several hours, yeah! And, I am sure I will go back to sleep soon. ¬†I just wanted to take a moment to let you know how this chemo round was going.

It has gone well. ¬†First of all, I have had excellent care takers¬† for each round of chemo (I could not do the days of chemo by myself, it’s just too difficult to be on my own and so much easier to have someone staying with me).¬† So thank you to everyone who has been here this time and for the preceding rounds, I owe you so much. My family and friends have taught me from one round to the next that I need to let them do things for me and most of all, I have learned how much I am loved. I am so grateful. The peace of mind that comes from knowing that I am not here alone – that someone is in the next bedroom or downstairs if I need anything, well I can not even begin to express my gratitude.

This chemo round has by far been the easiest. I am not out of it yet, but I feel better than I have in any of the preceding chemo rounds. Which is really kind of amazing. I still have symptoms, and I can definitely still feel it when the chemo hits (which is Saturday morning usually). But, it is much more manageable. And I have gotten used to the fact that that I just have to give into it and ride it out. I do get better and I do eventually resume my “normal routine”.

One of the hardest things about it is not the pain or other symptoms associated with the chemo, but, instead, the inability to do some of the simplest things. ¬†So, rather than try to do these simple tasks and be frustrated that I can not do them, I have someone here do it for me. I have to admit, that at first (especially since I didn’t know I would not be able to open a bottle of water by myself, or simply turn the rod on my blinds to close them or grasp something without dropping it, or just make a bowl of cereal for myself – it is amazing how by mid day on Saturday, I can sometimes no longer pick up a bowl and make some cereal without it involving pain or simply risking dropping it) it was embarrassing to ask someone for help. But, now I know that once the chemo hits, I have to have help with these things. ¬†And, thankfully, I have a wonderful group of friends and family who have come to my rescue. There are shifts so that I am never left alone during the days I am at my worst. I am so grateful for everyone’s help, I could NOT get through this alone.

So, how I am doing: considering everything, I am doing great! The chemo round went an hour shorter this time, so that was some improvement. I have taken as many as 9 to 10 hours to get in and out of there.  This time was the shortest Р8.  It made a big difference lobbing off that extra hour or two. My nurse started me even slower (infusion rate that is) and instead of that causing me to take longer to get all of the lovely chemo drugs into my system, it seemed to make it so that she could gradually speed up the rate without so many symptoms.  All in all, it went well.

My chemo rounds are always on Thursdays. The day after chemo, I come in for a shot of Neulasta. This shot causes my bone marrow to produce white blood cells (something the chemo causes to suppress the production of).  The down side of the Neulasta is that it causes me pretty severe bone pain Рor at least it did.  Amazingly enough, once I switched to my new oncologist, he changed my medications (increased the pre-medications, increased the number of days that I take steroids Рthis lessens swelling and pain as well Рand he suggested that I take Claritin to help with the pain and unbelievably it worked).  I still have pain, but nothing like before and it is tolerable.

I walked a mile on Saturday afternoon. I could not have gone on that walk with out my neighbor going with me (nor could my dog have joined me as I can’t walk her during this time – can’t handle the leash, grasping it and hanging onto her, despite her small size). ¬†I had also gone for a shorter walk in the morning with my friend who stayed the night with me Friday through Saturday. Excercise is so important and I really improve during the chemo days when I am able to get it. ¬†But, the mile proved to be a bit too much as Sunday I was a bit worse off. It is really important to get exercise during the chemo (not too much during the actual days of chemo, just walking).¬† But, the exercise thing is so key.¬† I am not anemic – yet – and hope to never get that way with these treatments.¬† Studies with women who undergo chemotherapy for breast cancer who exercised throughout their treatment had a reduced rate of anemia (the anemia caused by a reduction in red blood cell counts, this is what makes chemo patients so incredibly fatigued).¬† The doctor’s up at UCLA all say to get exercise, that it improves your immune system and reduces anemia.¬† So, that’s what I am doing and so far it has kept me right side up.

But, I did do a little too much on that longer walk yesterday.

Well, it’s back to bed for me.¬†¬† My parents are here with me tonight and then tomorrow it is back to some light work from home.¬† But, my power cord on my Mac (or maybe it is the battery on my Mac) has suddenly gone bad.¬† So, working from my bed (which I enjoy when I am up to it and NEED to be able to do – as much for sanity as finances) is not an option tomorrow. I would just go and buy another power cord, but don’t know whether it is the cord or the battery.¬† Aaargh.¬† I will have to find a friend with a matching cord to test it out I guess.

Please forgive my slow return on calls this week, after Chemo on Thursdays it can be a bit rough to take calls, make calls, write emails etc.¬† I so appreciate the support though, so please don’t stop praying for me, calling and checking in with me.¬† It is NEVER a bother and it is always appreciated.

Love to you all!