Hello all,
First of all, thank you so very much for your prayers and positive thoughts. It means so much to me and to my family.
I had an MRI on Tuesday and just got the results a few hours ago (online via WebMD). I checked my email and had a notification that something was uploaded for me on my WebMD account. I knew it was the results of a test and so logged in, while praying and hoping for the best. The report was long and included my history (an interesting read – being reminded of all that has occurred, all that has happened to my body in the past nearly three years now – is kind of surreal – seeing it relayed in medical terms, devoid of any emotion (of course) and in black in white is really weird). But, I digress.
The results are no evidence of disease (as in NED). Which is great news.
I am still waiting on a few other tests, but, so far so good.
I see my oncologist on February 9th (it is my hope to complete a 1/2 marathon on February 5th – pain be damned, I want to be able to report to my oncologist that I completed it when I see her on the 9th). I have not properly trained for it . . . too many pain days. But, so what, I will do what of it that I can.
We don’t have an answer as to where the pain is coming from and I fear that this will launch further scans . . . and at the same time, I fear that this will NOT launch further scans . . . it is an odd position to be in. I don’t know where the pain is coming from. Maybe it is from the Tamoxifen, maybe it is just after effects of all of the treatment. I am told I shouldn’t be in pain and that is why my oncologist has ordered tests. But, at some point, I wonder if maybe we figure that this is just where my body is at . . . I don’t want any cancer related explanation of the pain other than it is an after effect of the treatment or is related to Tamoxifen. Plain and simple, my bones hurt. I wake up in a lot of pain each day. But, for the most part it lessens after I get going and just work through it. Then it returns usually at the end of a day. Maybe that is just how it is for me, maybe this is normal for me for now? I can deal with that. I hope that it is nothing and I both hope that my oncologist will not order additional scans and at the same time, hope that she will . . . because I just don’t know why my bones hurt.
It is what it is. My worries are no different than anyone else’s who has been through this cancer escapade.
I am so grateful for so many things. Just a year ago, I could not do half what I am doing today. And two years ago, I was barely getting around, still in bed and struggling each day to get in a walk and to just get through each day. I am most grateful for all of you, for my family (both on and offline). You have all helped me so much. Your prayers, your support, your love, love your well wishing . . . it is all very powerful and makes such a difference to me. Thank you.
Peace and love,
Lisa
cancerfree2b 
So glad to hear your MRI was normal. I hear you about the scans. “To scan or not to scan.” You kind of want to and yet you don’t. I understand completely about the worries.
It’s impressive you are tackling a half-marathon! Good for you!
Keep us posted on everything and good luck!
Nancy, the 1/2 marathon may become a “pick me up at mile 5” situation or who knows. But, I am going to try. 🙂
AND, a friend of mine is joining me and will go at my pace, whatever that is (which is going to be pretty darn slow)!
Thank your comment about “to scan or not to scan” it is nice to hear that you understand . . . and of course you would. But, some people don’t get it, they think, “Oh, that’s great that your doc doesn’t want to do any further scans”. We will see how it goes.
I am really, really struggling to stay on task today!!!!! SO distracted by this Komen thing. I teach tonight until 10 pm and then have kids at home to deal with and so on and so on. I will be limited in my ability to spew snark, but, trust me, I will be back!
xoxoxoxoxox
Lisa
My bones hurt every day for the five years I was on Tamoxifen and for nearly a year afterward. Exercise was the only thing that kept me going.
I think you’re doing really well.
Oh, thank you so much for sharing that with me! You know, I have heard that Tamoxifen causes bone pain . . . but, it is NOT on the list of side effects on the drug (yet, it can cause bone loss and a whole host of lovelies). So, I keep asking doctors and pharmacists about whether Tamoxifen causes bone pain or not and they all tell me no.
But, hearing from you that you experienced this is so helpful. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. I really appreciate knowing about it, because the medical community (at least the one I am around) all deny that it is a side effect of Tamoxifen. Whatever. I don’t buy it.
Anyway, thank you for providing me with some peace of mind, I am grateful to you.
All the best,
xoxoxoxoxox
Lisa
We like good news!!! Fingers crossed on the pain issue. How about a nice hot tub?? Keep running, girlfriend. xoxo
Thank you!!!! I will probably be walking mostly, but, I am going to try to run what I can. I will report back. And, would you believe I do not have a bath tub!!!! I moved to be close to the beach . . . decided a few years ago that if I was going to die, it sure wasn’t going to be where I was living at the time . . . I was going to have a view . . . dang it. So, the sacrifice of being able to hear the ocean from my bedroom is that I have two and a half bathrooms (two with showers, but no tub in the whole place).
That’s okay. I will keep running . . . along the beach. The 1/2 marathon on Sunday goes along PCH for quite a bit of the course. I am excited about it. But, I really do not expect to finish it and I am okay with that. I just haven’t put in the training. But, I figure it can’t be worse than what cancer visited upon me, so if I can do that (get through chemo and surgeries and radiation and the pain from all of that) then I can do this, at least I am going to try.
Thank you for your crossed fingers and for thinking of me!
xoxoxoxoxox
Lisa
Hi Lisa, so happy to see your news and totally share your fears. I have to schedule a thyroid ultrasound, yuck. I don’t want to do that, but I will. As we all do. By the way, I don’t have bone pain with Tamoxifen, but I have heard it can be a severe side effect, especially in legs. I hope you can get some relief. xoxo