The Latest, Not So Greatest, But, No Surprises

25 Feb

Well, it has been a long day and it is only 3:30 pm. I saw my oncologist today and we discussed the issues that I detailed in my previous post from yesterday (the bone pain I am experiencing, Tamoxifen and possible alternatives to Tamoxifen, since I seem to be quite sensitive to the Tamoxifen).

As I expected, she wants to do a bone scan. Not too thrilled about that. I was hoping she would say with confidence that the pains I am having are simply related to the exercise and physical therapy I am going through or that it is left over, residual pain caused by the chemotherapy that I have had (chemo is pretty rough on your bones, heck it is rough on everything).

So, she is ordering a bone scan – a test I have not had since my cancer diagnosis (although I did have a bone scan many, many years ago after breaking my ankle – in of all places – Fashion Island, running in Susan G. Komen’s “Race for the Cure”. When they did an xray of my ankle, they saw some suspicious dark spots and ordered a bone scan then. That turned out to be a little bit of arthritis – not bone cancer. So, it was a two week scare – waiting for those results. That was in 1996 I think). Anyway, the bone scan takes about 30 minutes, you can’t move during that time. It is not invasive – not that I recall – I don’t recall their using any contrast dye (hate that stuff). So, the test itself should not be a big deal. It is the results that I am fearful of, naturally.

So, lots and lots of prayers please. The read between the lines is – the bone scan is to see if I have cancer in my bones. So, it has been a day and a half I think.

Such a roller coaster.

It was a very long session with both the nurse and then my oncologist. Most of our time was about the Tamoxifen issue (my lack of tolerance to it and alternatives to taking it). The short version is that I have some options, but none of them are appealing. They all involve taking medication (or a combination of medications) for five years. I knew this going in as well. But, it is still somehow much more sobering when you hear it from the doctor.

These options, which I will detail in a later post – not up to it right now – are something I have to choose. It is frustrating. On the one hand, I am in charge. On the other hand, I have to pick my poison 🙂 Sorry don’t mean to be grim. But, I don’t see how I am going to be any less sensitive to the alternative drugs that I can take to replace Tamoxifen.

Then there is the issue of timing. One option can be started prior to my March surgery, the rest can not. And, still another option involves surgery, but, I would still have to take a drug on top of that. So, my instinct is to not go that route (a surgical route, unless I have too).

Still, I have to do genetic counseling to find out if I am braca positive – meaning, whether or not my breast cancer has a genetic connection/cause. If it does, then that means I have a 40 to 50% chance of getting ovarian cancer. So, if that is the case (that I test positive) then I would have the surgery to remove my ovaries.

I learned, for the first time, that because I am young to be diagnosed with this type of breast cancer, there is a higher likelihood that I would be braca positive. But, all of this is unknown (whether I am braca positive or not, and so I am not going there, except I AM going to get tested). I had known before, that it was pretty rare for a woman of my age to get this type of breast cancer. I just had never heard that it meant that it was more likely to have a genetic cause.

Anyway, my head is swimming. My poor Mom’s must be too – she was in the room most of the time. She left a couple of times to make a call or something – but personally, I think she left the room to cry – and to not do it in front of me.

It is so hard to be dragging my parents through this seemingly endless stress and pain.

So that’s all for now. Wish I had more positive news to share. But, hopefully after the bone scan, I will – that is what I am praying for and hope you will all pray for me too.

I have to go now and get ready to play my bass tonight. I haven’t played since last summer, pre-surgery. I played with my blues band at the Orange County Fair. It was fun. We are playing a fairly big venue (big for me that is) and I haven’t played at all since July – should be interesting. The show must go on. 🙂

We are not the headline act. And, the place opens up two hours before the show starts – so plenty of time for people to have had too much to drink to notice that the bass player is off. At least that is what I am banking on 🙂

Please continue to keep me in your prayers, I really, really need it right now.

Love and peace,

L.

2 Responses to “The Latest, Not So Greatest, But, No Surprises”

  1. Sandy February 25, 2010 at 5:06 PM #

    Have a great time tonight! Your love of music comes through in your playing, and that’s far more enjoyable for the audience than technical precision – which most non-musicians don’t notice anyway.

    Love,
    Sandy

  2. David February 25, 2010 at 11:43 PM #

    Hello Lisa,

    Hope you had a great time tonight! I totally forgot that you were doing the show. So sorry I missed it.

    The prayers are coming your way, non-stop. Hope to chat soon.

    Love,

    David

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